Depression - How It Works and How to Prevent It
Have you ever been depressed? It's no fun. When you are depressed, you become very negative. You have no energy and no confidence. There is no peace of mind and no hope. You are in a very dark place. Does this sound familiar?
Life is very painful when you are in this state. You lose your ability to find solutions and become very ineffective. Fortunately, there is something you can do about it. You can be free of depression and you can get your life back.
Depression may seem to be caused by your circumstances, but it's not. It is the result of how you relate to your circumstances. There may also be chemical aspects of depression, but for now, we are just going to talk about the mental aspects.
Here is how it works: Something happens that strikes a nerve. We lose a relationship, a job, or some other major event takes place. These circumstances trigger a childhood hurt of feeling worthless, not good enough, not worth loving, failure, or some other form of feeling "not okay."
It's not the truth that we are this way, it's just a suppressed emotion, but it's an emotion that we will do almost anything to avoid feeling. Usually, we are able to push this emotion back down, but sometimes the circumstances are so overwhelming, we can't.
These circumstances are subconsciously perceived as a major threat to our survival. In an automatic attempt to avoid this threat, we act in a way that creates depression.
How we create depression
• We withdraw from life.
• We become "at the effect" of our circumstances.
• We stop moving forward.
We withdraw
When you are active in life, you tend to be happy. You have momentum and the energy to make things happen. You are also in a place where solutions and opportunity show up.
When you withdraw, you shut this down. You close down and stop taking action. Your energy drops and your negativity grows. You stop getting new thoughts and life doesn't work as well.
We become "at the effect"
At any moment, the circumstances of your life are exactly the way that they are. This is true whether you like it or not. When you are at peace with the truth of the way your situation is, you can focus on what needs to be done based on the facts. When you do this, life works.
Now look at any area of your life that isn't working and notice the direction of your focus. Instead of looking to see what needs to be done based on the truth of the way your situation is, your focus is on fighting the truth of the way your situation is.
When you do this, you give all your power to your circumstances. You make yourself a victim and put yourself "at the effect". Instead of being on top of your situation, your situation is now on top of you.
Instantly, your confidence and energy disappear. You lose your ability to find solutions and you tend to make your situation worse. Whenever you are depressed, you are deep at the effect.
We stop moving forward
Imagine being in the deep part of a lake. As long as you are swimming, you stay above water. As soon as you stop swimming, you start to sink. The same thing is true about life. As long as you are moving forward, you stay on top of life. As soon as you stop moving forward, you start to sink.
Depression is created by the combination of withdrawing, being at the effect, and not moving forward.
To be free of depression, take the following steps:
• Find and heal the suppressed hurt that creates and fuels the depression.
• Get active. This is the opposite of withdrawing. Find things that you enjoy doing and do them as often as possible. Get out in the world. Be with people and have fun. Exercise.
• Find the specific aspects of your life that you are resisting. Surrender to the truth of the way your situation is. Then see what needs to be done based on this truth and start taking action.
• Get clear on what you want in life and start taking steps to have your dreams come true. The steps can be small ones at first. That's okay. Just make sure you are moving forward.
You can be free of depression. Problem areas can clear up and you can create an incredible life, but you need to know how and you need to take the steps.
To learn more about depression and how to heal it, visit http://www.masteryoflife.com/depression.shtml.
Bill Ferguson has been featured on Oprah and recommended by The Wall Street Journal. His approach to life has been called "The penicillin of psychology." His book, How to Heal a Painful Relationship, has become a national best seller. He is also the author of Get Your Power Back and Miracles Are Guaranteed.
Bill leads workshops and does individual consulting. He shows, step-by-step, how to heal relationships, resolve problem areas, and have life work. To learn more and to receive a free e-course, visit his website at http://www.masteryoflife.com.
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